August 05, 2005
Pushing back the frontiers of ignorance................
There have been an average of 160,000 troops in theater in Iraq during the last 22 months. The firearm death rate works out to 60 per 100,000. The firearm death rate in Washington, D.C. is 80.6 per 100,000.
That means that you are more likely to be shot and killed in our Nation's Capitol, which has some of the strictest gun control laws in the nation, than you are in Iraq.
Conclusion: We should immediately pull out of Washington, D.C.
If you don't pay your exorcist you get repossessed.
They keep saying the right person will come along; I think a bus hit mine.
Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
Don't follow in my footsteps, because I run into a lot of walls.
Lord help me to relax about insignificant details beginning tomorrow at 7:41:23 am EST
This is National Get Acquainted with Zespri New Zealand Kiwi Fruit Month
This is Don't Wait! Celebrate! Week
August 7 is...Treasure Your Customers Day
August 7 is...Sea Serpent Day [Be nice to your sea serpent!]
August 8 is...Sneak Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor's Porch Night
August 8 is...Admit You're Happy Day [Everybody is tired of your whining!]
August 8 is...Kool-Aid Day
August 8 is...Work Like A Dog Day
August 9 is...International Single-Out Day
August 9 is...National Garage Sale Day
August 9 is...Veep Day
August 9 is...National Polka Festival [Just Bobby Vinton and I celebrate this one]
August 10 is...Lazy Day [Aha - it's official]
August 10 is...National Duran Duran Appreciation Day
August 10 is...Spoil Your Dog Day
August 11 is...Presidential Joke Day
August 12 is...Middle Child's Day
August 13 is...Blame Someone Else Day [As opposed to what other day?]
"TSA TO CUT SCREENERS AT LOCAL AIRPORTS" The Transportation Safety Administration is just plain sadistic. WNBC TV - New York City - July 28
THAT'S JUST NUTS: "Squirrel Fires Regular Occurrence in Canadian Border Town" -- AP headline
Thinnest Books of all time......................
MY BEAUTY SECRETS by Janet Reno
HOW TO BUILD YOUR OWN AIRPLANE by John Denver
MY SUPER BOWL HIGHLIGHTS by Dan Marino
THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BILL by HILLARY CLINTON
MY LIFE'S MEMORIES by Ronald Reagan
And an old quote that came true in Absurdia, the intrinsic
capital of The Peoples Republic of Absurdistan: (but not for the first time!~)
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?" - H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927
Just think, H. M. Warner never even met Tom Cruise!!!
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