March 10, 2006

Fridays Musings

Pushing back the frontiers of ignorance .......................

Marriage is the best teacher of all. It teaches you loyalty, forbearance, meekness, self-restraint, forgiveness and a great many other qualities you wouldn't have needed if you'd stayed single.


Jean's genes stretchers .....................................

It is sobering to consider that when Mozart was my age he'd already been dead for many years

What can I do about all the sex, nudity, language and violence on my VCR?

Nothing cures insomnia like the realization that it's time to get up.

A good listener is usually thinking about something else

Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is weak?


Sara's Section .....................................

This is Irish-American Heritage Month

This is also Keep Your Shoelaces Tied Month (A coinkydink?)

This week is National Toad Hollow Week

March 12 is . . Armstrong County's 206th anniversary!!!!!!

March 13 is . . National Open An Umbrella Indoors Day

March 14 is . . National Potato Chip Day

March 15 is . . Buzzard's Day -buzzards return to Hinckley, Ohio

March 15 is . . Everything You Think Is Wrong Day [Oh! you are married too?]

March 15 is . . Maple Syrup Day

March 15 is . . Save the Florida Panther Day [How about the Miami Dolphins?]

March 15 is . . True Confessions Day

March 16 is . . Lips Appreciation Day [Kiss me!]

March 16 is . . Everything You Do Is Right Day Better than the 15th!]

March 17 is . . St Patrick's Day

March 17 is . . Act Happy Day [Even if you are not Irish]

March 17 is . . Submarine Day [Eat one or ride in one?]

March 18 is . . Supreme Sacrifice Day [Start a new diet?]

March 18 is . . Awkward Moments Day

March 18 is . . National Biodiesel Day [and her brother Vin Diesel]


Actual Headlines .....................................................

THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU LET THE NEW GUY HANDLE IT: "H&R Block Fumbles on Its Own Tax Return" -- New York Times headline

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [What a guy!]

Miners Refuse to Work after Death [What ever happened to the American work ethic?]


More State Mottos ......................................

Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster

Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It

Massachusetts: Our taxes are less Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)

Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians

Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes... And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes

Mississippi: Come And Feel Better About Your Own State

Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work


We are still being protected from the "Great Evil" (not El Qaeda -Wal-Mart) here in the city of Absurdia, the capital of the collective known as The Peoples Republic of Absurdistan so you read the above while I go shopping.


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