May 12, 2006

Friday's Musings

Pushing back the frontiers of ignorance ...............................

Talk about price gouging and the price of gasoline! All the oil companies do is search for oil, drill for it, extract it, process it, deliver it, build gasoline stations, advertise, pay taxes, etc. and for this, their profit is 6 to 16 cents per gallon. On the other hand, our local, state and federal government does all it can to block every step the oil company does and for this they net almost two dollars per gallon.

10 cents versus two dollars - now, who is gouging?

Mary's muted mutterings ..............................

People always say, "He died penniless," as if it's a terrible thing. I don't know, it sounds like good timing to me.

After his divorce, Mr. Smith realized that poker isn't the only game that starts with holding hands and ends with an astounding financial loss.

Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it.

Home computers are the perfect thing for women who don't feel that men provide them with enough frustration

It doesn't matter whether you win or lose -- until you lose.

Sara's Salutary Section ................................

April is National Knuckles Down Month

This is National Blue Ribbon Week

May 14 is International Moment of Laughter Day

May 15 is Rubber Eraser Day

May 16 is National Stress Awareness [Like I wasn't already aware!!!]

May 16 is also Self Day [Just for me!]

May 17 is National Cheeseball Day

May 18 is Blah, Blah, Blah Day

May 19 is Pet Owners Independence Day

May 19 is also Beyond Rejection Slip Day [For our budding? authors]

May 19 is also Husband Appreciation Day [And it's about time]

Actual Headlines .......................................

IT'S ALSO APPARENTLY SLOW NEWS DAY: "It's National Hairball Awareness Day" -- Philadelphia Inquirer headline

IT'S SO SIMPLE, YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF IT: "Make More Money, [Prime Minister] Berlusconi Tells Poor Italians" -- Reuters headline

New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group [Weren't they fat enough?!]

Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft [That's what he gets for eating those beans!]

Kids Make Nutritious Snacks [Taste like chicken?]

More "Rules for Life" ............................

I was thinking about old age and decided that it is 'when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it'.

I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age, and call it "Pumping Rust."

I have gotten that dreaded furniture disease. That's when your chest is falling into your drawers!

I know, when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company!"

That's it for this week from your embedded reporter, deep in the bottom of a non-descript cinder-block and steel building somewhere near the city of Absurdia, the government recognized capital of the Peoples Republic of Absurdistan.


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