April 13, 2007

Pushing back the frontiers of ignorance ......................

 
I think it is about time for President Bush to come up with his promised bill on illegal aliens that will NOT offer an automatic road to citizenship.  After all, they did break the law.   If he doesn't come out with his bill very, very soon, I think it is time to start impeachment proceedings............
 
Saul of Tarsus (St Paul) saw a burning bush on the road to Damascus.  Nancy Pelosi saw her credibility burning.  Then she lied to al-Assad, the murderous dictator of a terrorist government, about a supposed agreement that the Israeli's never made.  All the while, al-Assad was thinking - a woman like this is worth an elderly goat or sheep.

Marvelous Mary's Melodious Mutterings .......................
 
Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on too long.
 
Washington DC is like Hollywood for ugly people
 
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you  can't improve your lie
 
I bet the guy who said there was only one way to skin a cat never owned a Salad Shooter.
 
I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.
Serendipitous Sarah's Sayings .................................
 
April is National Smile Month
 
This is National Karaoke Week
 
April 15 is Rubber Eraser Day
 
April 15 is National Stress Awareness Day    [Tax day too! Coincidence?]
 
April 16 is the day in 1955 that Ray Krok opened the first McDonalds!!!!!
 
April 16 is Self Day
 
April 16 is National Eggs Benedict Day    [Also Bacon Arnold Day]
 
April 16 is National Stress Awareness Day
 
April 17 is National Cheeseball Day
 
April 17 is Blah, Blah, Blah Day
 
April 18 is International Jugglers Day
 
April 18 is Eggs, Eggs, Eggs Days
 
April 19 is the day Janet Reno & Bill Clinton killed all those innocent people at Waco, TX.
 
April 19 is Garlic Day   [Stink about that!]
 
April 19 is Beyond Rejection Slip Day
 
April 20 is Look Alike Day    [Who do you look alike?]
 
April 21 is Kindergarten Day
Live from NYC, it's Jeni ..............................
 
There may be errors in this newsletter.  Any errors or "typos" you find were also found by me less than 10 minutes after I sent it out.  As far as spelling is concerned, Mark Twain once said, I feel bad for the man that can't spell a word more than one way.

Actual Headlines .............................................
 
In the Spring? No Way!: "Scientists: Lake Superior Warming Rapidly" ---CNN.com
 
Maybe They Went to the Doughnut Shop: "State Police Looking for New Troopers"---Oregonian
 
Wouldn't a Higher Salary Be More Appropriate?: "Police Chief Asks Public For Tips" ---The Kansas City Star
 
Because if They Weren't, They'd Be Big Dogs!: "Researchers have finally solved one of the great canine mysteries: Why are small dogs small?" ---Los Angeles Times
 
News You Can Use: "Food Safety Experts Share Some Advice: 'Don't Eat Poop'---The Pueblo (CO) Chieftain
Thoughts in a lazy mind ................................................
 
If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog while talking on a cell phone.
 
If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
 
The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.
 
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

Laws you had better remember ..................................
 
Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to go to the bathroom.
 
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

That's it from your embedded reporter for this week.  Still lurking around the edges of the City of Absurdia, the capital of The Peoples Democratic Republic of Absurdistan.

But on the other hand ................................
 
When you look at yourself from a universal standpoint, something inside always reminds or informs you that there are bigger and better things to worry about.
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