May 11 is . . Twilight Zone Day
May 12 is . . Limerick Day
May 13 is . . Leprechaun Day
May 14 is . . National Dance Like A Chicken Day
May 14 is . . Underground America Day
May 15 is . . National Chocolate Chip Day [One of my favorites]
May 16 is . . Wear Purple Day
May 16 is . . National Bike to Work Day [On the beltway?]
May 17 is . . Pack Rat Day
Haughty Hilda's Hilarious
STATE AGENCY FIGURES OUT HOW TO STAY IN
BUSINESS FOREVER: "State Regulators Look at Car Dealer Accused of Lying to
Customers" -- AP headline
Breaking News From 1914: "Gas Engines:
Here to Stay" ---CNNMoney.com
'OK, We'll Rescue You, but We're Not
Happy About It!': "Moody Airmen Rescue Cuban Migrants Found at Sea" ---Air
Force Print News
Welfare Reform Testimonials: "Jobs: 'Not
as Bad as We Thought"' ---CNNMoney.com
Help Wanted: "Naked Man Sought"
---Northern Echo (Darlington, England)
News You Can Use: "Drinking Dulls the
Brain's Response to Threats" ---Reuters
Saucy Suzi's Scattered
Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN
He broke into song because he couldn't
find the key.
A calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours,
and 'taint mine.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
My wife finally convinced me to sign
what's called a living will. It's a document that gives her the right, if I
become attached to some mechanical device, to terminate my life. So
yesterday, I'm on the exercise bike, and..."
I read this article that said the
typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving
too fast. Are they kidding? That's my idea of a perfect day.
Perilous Pauline's Pugnacious
Wash your face in the morning, neck at
I can't think of any more poetry,” she
Why can't a woman ask for help from her
brother? He can't be a brother and assist her, too.
Have you read the new book "Little
Fishes" by Anne Chovey?
OLD COMPOSERS never die, they just
And a bonus Shaggy Dog story....
During rehearsal, the high school Music
Director was beside himself. The cymbal player in the band was constantly
coming in at the wrong time with his cymbal clash. The young man maintained
that his entry point gave a much better effect and that he wouldn't play it
as written. When the Music Director was asked by the Principal why he fired
the young musician from the band, he replied,
"It was a simple case of cymbal
Books you need to read......................
You Always Get Caught" by Sue Nora Later
How To Do It; or, Directions for Knowing or Doing Everything Needful; 1864
The Dark At The End Of The Bong, by Bob Newland
Your Friend, The Computer Hacker, by Carolyn Meinel
Industrial Hemp: Fiber, Food and Fuel for the Future, by Chris Conrad
That is about it for this week from just outside the Woodbine
Beltway, just a stone's throw from Absurdia, the principle city of The
People's Democratic Republic of Absurdistan where our boy Governor, Martin
O'Malley, has not, as yet, been indicted for lying. One can always hope
that justice will be done.....
But, on the other hand ................................