May 30, 2008

 

Pushing back the frontiers of ignorance..................

 
At last!  The truth from the "horse's mouth!"  During a town meeting last August in his Pennsylvania district, Rep. Kanjorski made a remarkable statement about the 2006 election in which Democrats recaptured the majority.   Rep. Kanjorski acknowledged that he and his fellow Democrats "sort of stretched the facts" about their intention to end the war in Iraq and bring American troops home.   A video of his remarks,  is now on YouTube
 
Gas is now over $4.00 per gallon.  The one thing that would reduce this cost is drilling in Anwar.  The Democrats say that if we did, it would be ten (10) years before it could be delivered.   OF COURSE, THEY SAID THE SAME THING 10 YEARS AGO!!
Meticulous Mary's Meritorious Mutterings...................
 
Concord, NH -- A study conducted by the Fish & Game Commission found that an average of 239 moose are killed on the state's highways every year. Which is almost three times the casualty rates of the Elks, the Lions and the Knights of Columbus combined.
 
It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water.
 
The Romans didn't find algebra very challenging, because X was always 10
 
No matter how long you keep a calendar, its days are numbered
 
After divorce, most men realize that poker isn't the only game that starts with holding hands and ends with an astounding financial loss.
Superficial Sarah's Silly Sayings............................
 
June is Turkey Lover's Month
 
June is also National Accordion Awareness Month
 
June 1 is . . . . . Dare Day
 
June 2 is . . . . . National Rocky Road Day
 
June 3 is . . . . . Repeat Day
 
June 3 is . . . . . Repeat Day
 
June 4 is . . . . . Old Maid's Day
 
June 5 is . . . . . Festival Of Popular Delusions Day
 
June 6 is . . . . . Teacher's Day and National Applesauce Cake Day    [and Sarah says that is no coincidence]
 
June 7 is . . . . . National Chocolate Ice Cream Day

Happy Hilda's Hip Headlines..........................
 
PUNISHMENT, OR REWARD? "Priest Who Was Chaplain Gets 4 Years for Sex with Inmates" -- AP headline
 
What Do You Call 100 Silent War Protesters? A Good Start!: "Protesters Give Iraq War the Silent Treatment" ---Grand Rapids (MI) Press
 
Breaking News From 2005: "AP IMPACT: Leaky New Orleans Levee Alarms Experts" ---Associated Press
 
We Blame Global Warming: "Dawn of an Ice Age: Hockey's Hot Again!" ---MSNBC.com
 
We're Going to Guess Jimmy Carter: "WHO Calls on Israel to Lift Palestinian Blockade" ---Agence France-Presse
 
Sounds Awfully Harsh to Us: "Initiative to Target Kids With Guns" ---Pioneer Press (St. Paul, MN) 
 
Sounds Awfully Lenient to Us: "Boy Band Creator Sentenced to 25 Years in Prison" ---Associated Press
 
News You Can Use: "Sitting Too Long Before Computer May Lead to Piles"---China Post (Taipei)
Saucy Suzi's Stipulations......................
 
Acupuncture: a jab well done.
 
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
 
Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
 
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?    He's all right now.
 
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
Lean Larry's Litigious Leavings..................
 
I stopped taking tranquilizers...I was starting to be nice to people I didn't even want to talk to.
 
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.
 
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and is a good cook, but the law allows for only one wife.
Books you need to read!........................
 
The Interpretation of Geological Time from the Evidence of Fossilized Elephant Droppings in Eastern Europe
 
Proceedings of the Second International Workshop on Nude Mice
 
Oral Sadism and the Vegetable Personality
 
Big and Very Big Hole Drilling
 
The Theory of Lengthwise Rolling
Ethan's Ethos...............................
 
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
 
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV
 
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
That's it for this week from your embedded reporter, hiding between the Woodbine Beltway and the Absurdistan Beltway, deep in what's left of the heart of Absurdistan where we are still waiting for Congressman John Murtha, Democrat, Pennsylvania to apologize for calling our Marines rapists and murderers!

But, on the other hand.......................
 
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us

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