ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC.
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ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
I
OTHER BOOKS
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS
An Interpretive Commentary on the A.A. Program
By a Cofounder
(190 Pages)
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS COMES OF AGE
A Brief History of A.A.'s First Two Decades
(335 Pages)
AS BILL SEES IT
(formerly the A.A. Way of Life)
Selected Writings of A.A.'s Cofounder
(346 Pages)
BOOKLETS
CAME TO BELIEVE...
Spiritual Experiences of 75 A.A.'s
(120 Pages)
LIVING SOBER
Practical Suggestions Heard at Meetings
(88 Pages)
ii
ALCOHOLICS
ANONYMOUS
____________________________________________
The Story of
How Many Thousands of Men and Women
Have Recovered from Alcoholism
THIRD EDITION
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC.
NEW YORK CITY
1976
iii
Copyright 1 1939,1955, 1976 by
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS WORLD SERVICES, INC.
All rights reserved.
Sixteen printings from 1939 to 1955
Sixteen printings from 1955 to 1974
Third Edition, New & Revised, 1976
Personal Stories on pages 327,342,353,369,396,418,
439, 457, 474, 478, 526, and 554 are copyrighted 1
by
The A.A. Grapevine, Inc. and are reprinted here with permission.
Library of Congress Catalog Card No. 764029
ISBN 0916856003
PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
iv
Chapter.........................................................................Page
PREFACE.....................................................................XI
FORWARD TO FIRST EDITION......................................XIII
FORWARD TO SECOND EDITION....................................XV
FORWARD TO THIRD EDITION......................................XXI
THE DOCTOR'S OPINION.............................................XIII
1..BILL'S STORY............................................................1
2..THERE IS A SOLUTION..............................................17
3..MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM.......................................30
4..WE AGNOSTICS.......................................................44
5..HOW IT WORKS......................................................58
6..INTO ACTION..........................................................72
7..WORKING WITH OTHERS..........................................89
8..TO WIVES.............................................................104
9..THE FAMILY AFTERWARD.........................................122
10.TO EMPLOYERS......................................................136
11.A VISION FOR YOU.................................................151
PERSONAL STORIES
DOCTOR BOB'S NIGHTMARE.........................................171
A cofounder of Alcoholics Anonymous. The
birth of our Society dates from his first day of
permanent sobriety, June 10, 1935
v
vi CONTENTS
1...ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS NUMBER THREE ...............182
Pioneer member of Akron's Group No. 1, the first
A.A. group in the world. He kept the faith: there
fore, he and countless others found a new life.
2...HE HAD TO BE SHOWN............................................193
"Who is convinced against his will is of the same
opinion still." But not this man.
3...HE THOUGHT HE COULD DRINK LIKE A GENTLE
MAN
.........................................................................210
But he discovered that here are some gentlemen
who can't drink.
4...WOMEN SUFFER TOO...............................................222
Despite great opportunities, alcohol nearly ended
her life. Early member, she spread the word among
women in our pioneering period.
5...THE EUROPEAN DRINKER..........................................230
Beer and wine were not the answer.
6...THE VICIOUS CYCLE.................................................238
How it broke a Southerner's obstinacy and
destined this salesman to start A.A. in Philadelphia.
7...THE NEWS HAWK.....................................................251
This newsman covered life from top to bottom;
but he ended up, safely enough, in the middle.
8...FROM FARM TO CITY................................................261
She tells how A.A. works when the going is
rough. A pioneer woman member of A.A.'s first
Group.
9...THE MAN WHO MASTERED FEAR.................................275
He spent eighteen years in running away; and
then found he didn't have to run. So he started
A.A. in Detroit.
vii CONTENTS
10..HE SOLD HIMSELF SHORT..........................................287
But he found that there was a Higher Power
which had more faith in him than he had in him
self. Thus, A.A. was born in Chicago.
11..HOME BREWMEISTER................................................297
An originator of Cleveland's Group No. 3, this
one fought Prohibition in vain.
12..THE KEYS OF THE KINGDOM.......................................304
This worldly lady helped develop A.A. in Chi
cago and thus passed her keys to many.
They Stopped in Time
1...TOO
YOUNG?.............................................................317
Sergeants, doctors, and girl friendseverybody
seemed to be picking on him. But he couldn't be an
alcoholic at his age, could he.
2...FEAR OF
FEAR............................................................321
This lady was cautious. She decided she wouldn't
let herself go in her drinking. And she would never,
never take that morning drink!
3...THOSE GOLDEN YEARS.................................................327
All the joys of retirement lay ahead for this movie
publicist. Safely pensioned, with no job to protect,
at last he could drink as he pleased.
4.THE HOUSEWIFE WHO DRANK AT HOME...........................335
She hid her bottles in clothes hampers and dresser
drawers. In A.A., she discovered she had lost noth
ing and found everything
5...LIFESAVING WORDS....................................................342
For this officer in the Indian Army, going on the
wagon was not enough; attempts at control failed.
viii CONTENTS
6...PHYSICIAN HEAL THYSELF!...........................................345
Psychiatrist and surgeon, he had lost his way un
till he realized that God, not he, was the Great
Healer.
7...A TEENAGER'S DECISION.............................................353
Just three years of drinking pushed a shy, lonely
young girl to the depths of depression. Out of sheer
despair, she called for help.
8...RUM, RADIO AND REBELLION......................................356
This man faced the last ditch when his wife's
voice from over 1,300 miles away sent him to A.A.,
9...ANY DAY WAS WASHDAY............................................369
This secret drinker favored the local Laundromat
as a watering hole. Now, she no longer risks losing
her home, her self-respect, or her laundry.
10..IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN WORSE......................................373
Alcohol was a looming cloud in this banker's
bright sky. He realized it could become a tornado.
11..A FLOWER OF THE SOUTH..........................................384
Faded, she bloomed afresh and had a chance to
help start A.A. in Texas
12..CALCULATING THE COSTS..........................................396
A retired Navy man looks back over twenty years
of drinking, to add up his A.A. "initiation fee."
13..STARS DON'T FALL....................................................400
A titled lady, she still saw her world darkening.
When the overcast lifted, the stars were there.
14..GROWING UP ALL OVER AGAIN...................................418
A "good boy" reached adulthood and success
without achieving maturity or fulfillment. Defeated
by alcohol and pills, he found the way to a new life.
ix CONTENTS
15..UNTO THE SECOND GENERATION.................................422
A young veteran tells how a few rough experi
ences pushed into A.A.
16..ME AN ALCOHOLIC.....................................................432
Barleycorn's wringer squeezed this author but he
escaped quite whole.
17..DOCTOR, ALCOHOLIC, ADDICT....................................439
The physician wasn't hooked, he thought he just
prescribed drugs indicated for his ailments.
They Nearly Lost All
1...A FIVE TIME LOSER WINS.............................................457
The worst of prison treatment couldn't break this
tough con. Then a miracle happened.
2...PROMOTED TO CHRONIC..............................................464
This career girl preferred solitary drinking, the
blackout kind, often hoping she'd stay that way for
keeps. But Providence had other ideas.
3...JOIN THE TRIBE..........................................................474
From a Canadian reservation to overseas bars to
New England lockups, an Indian traveled a long.
trail.
4...BELLE OF THE BALL.....................................................478
Waitress by day, barfly by night, she drifted down
the years into jail. Than A.A. showed her the beauty
of normal living, in a whole family reborn.
5...JIM'S STORY...............................................................483
This physician, the originator of A.A.'s first black
group, tells how freedom came
6...OUR SOUTHERN FRIEND...............................................497
Pioneer A.A., minister's son, and Southern farmer,
he asked, "Who am I to say there is no God?"
x CONTENTS
7...THE PRISONER FREED..................................................508
After twenty years in prison for murder, he knew
A.A. was for him...if he wanted to stay outside.
8...DESPERATION DRINKING..............................................512
Finally, he drank to hold on to his sanity, to keep
away those little men and those strange faces.
9...THE CAREER OFFICER..................................................517
Brandy "retired" this Irishman. But he survived.
to become a mainstay of A.A. in Eire.
10..ANOTHER CHANCE......................................................526
Poor, black, totally ruled by alcohol, she felt shut
away from any life worth living. But when she be
gan a prison sentence, a door opened.
11..HE WHO LOSES HIS LIFE..............................................531
A playwright lets his brains get too far ahead of
his emotions. To learn to live, he nearly died.
12..FREEDOM FROM BONDAGE............................................544
Young when she joined, this A.A. believes her
serious drinking was the result of even deeper de
fects. She here tells us how she was set free.
13..A.A. TAUGHT HIM TO HANDLE SOBRIETY....................... 554
"God willing, we...may never again have to
deal with drinking, but we have to deal with sobri
ety every day."
1. The A A Tradition
2. Spiritual Experience
3. The Medical View on A.A.
4. The Lasker Award
5. The Religious View on A.A.
6. How to Get in Touch With A.A.
This is the third edition of the book
"Alcoholics
Anonymous". The first edition appeared in April
1939, and in the following sixteen years, more than
300,000 copies went into circulation. The second edi
tion, published in 1955, reached a total of more than
1,150,000 copies.
Because this book has become the basic text for our
Society and has helped such large numbers of alco
holic men and women to recovery, there exists a sen
timent against any radical changes being made in it.
Therefore, the first portion of this volume, describing
the A.A. recovery program, has been left untouched in
the course of revisions made for both the second and
the third editions. The section called "The Doctor's
Opinion" has been kept intact, just as it was origi
nally written in 1939 by the late Dr. William D. Silk
worth, our Society's Great medical benefactor.
The second edition added the appendices, the
Twelve Traditions, and the directions for getting in
touch with A.A. But the chief change was in the sec
ion of personal stories, which was expanded to reflect
the Fellowship's growth. "Bill's Story," "Doctor Bob's
Nightmare," and six other personal histories from the
first edition were retained; thirty completely new stories were
added; and the story section was
ii PREFACE
divided into three parts, under the same headings that
are used now.
In this third edition, Part I ("Pioneers of
A.A.")
stands unchanged. Nine of the stories in Part II ("They
Stopped in Time") are carried over from the second
edition; eight new stories have been added. In Part
III ("They Lost Nearly All"), eight stories have been
retained; five are new.
All changes made over the years in the Big Book
(A.A. members' fond nickname for this volume) have
had the same purpose; to represent the current mem
bership of Alcoholics Anonymous more accurately, and
thereby to reach more alcoholics. If you have a drink
ing problem, we hope that you may pause in reading
one of the forty-four personal stories and think: "Yes,
that happened to me"; or, more important, "Yes, I've
felt like that"; or, most important, "Yes, I believe this
program can work for me, too."
This is the Foreword as it appeared in the first
printing of the first edition in 1939.
We, of Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than
one hundred men and women who have re
covered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and
body. To show other alcoholics precisely how we
have recovered is the main purpose of this book. For
them, we hope these pages will prove so convincing
that no further authentication will be necessary. We
think this account of our experiences will help every
one to better understand the alcoholic. Many do not
comprehend that the alcoholic is a very sick person.
And besides, we are sure that our way of living has
its advantages for all.
It is important that we remain anonymous because
we are too few, at present to handle the overwhelm
ing number of personal appeals which may result
from this publication. Being mostly business or pro
fessional folk, we could not well carry on our occupa
ions in such an event. We would like it understood
that our alcoholic work is an avocation.
When writing or speaking publicly about alcoholi
sm, we urge each of our Fellowship to omit his
personal name, designating himself instead as "a
member of Alcoholics Anonymous."
Very earnestly we ask the press also, to observe this
request, for otherwise we shall be greatly handi
capped.
We are not an organization in the conventional
xiii
xiv FORWARD TO FIRST EDITION
sense of the word. There are no fees or dues what
soever. The only requirement for membership is an
honest desire to stop drinking. We are not allied with
any particular faith, sect or denomination, nor do we
oppose anyone. We simply wish to be helpful to those
who are afflicted.
We shall be interested to hear from those who are
getting results from this book, particularly form those
who have commenced work with other alcoholics. We
should like to be helpful to such cases.
Inquiry by scientific, medical, and religious
societies
will be welcomed.
ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
Figures given in this foreword describe the
Fellowship as it was in 1955.
Since the original Foreword to this book was
written in 1939, a wholesale miracle has taken
place. Our earliest printing voiced the hope "that
every alcoholic who journeys will find the Fellowship
of Alcoholics Anonymous at his destination. Already,"
continues the early text, "twos and threes and fives of
us have sprung up in other communities."
Sixteen years have elapsed between our first printing
of this book and the presentation of 1955 of our second
edition. In that brief space, Alcoholics Anonymous
has mushroomed into nearly 6,000 groups whose mem
bership is far above 150,000 recovered alcoholics.
Groups are to be found in each of the United States
and all of the provinces of Canada. A.A. has flourish
ing communities in the British Isles, the Scandinavian
countries, South Africa, South America, Mexico,
Alaska, Australia and Hawaii. All told, promising
beginnings have been made in some 50 foreign coun
tries and U.S. possessions. Some are just now taking
shape in Asia. Many of our friends encourage us by
saying that this is but a beginning, only the augury of
a much larger future ahead.
The spark that was to flare into the first A.A. group
was struck at Akron, Ohio in June 1935, during a talk
between a New York stockbroker and an Akron
physician. Six months earlier, the broker had been
relieved of his drink obsession by a sudden spiritual
xv
xvi FORWARD
experience, following a meeting with an alcoholic
friend who had been in contact with the Oxford
Groups of that day. He had also been greatly helped
by the late Dr. William D. Silkworth, a New York
specialist in alcoholism who is now accounted no less
than a medical saint by A.A. members, and whose story
of the early days of our Society appears in the
next pages. From this doctor, the broker had learned
the grave nature of alcoholism. Though he could not
accept all the tenets of the Oxford Groups, he was
convinced of the need for moral inventory, confession
of personality defects, restitution to those harmed,
helpfulness to others, and the necessity of belief in and
dependence upon God.
Prior to his journey to Akron, the broker had worked
hard with many alcoholics on the theory that only an
alcoholic could help an alcoholic, but he had suc-
ceeded only in keeping sober himself. The broker had
gone to Akron on a business venture which had
collapsed, leaving him greatly in fear that he might
start drinking again. He suddenly realized that in
order to save himself he must carry his message to
another alcoholic. That alcoholic turned out to be
the Akron physician.
This physician had repeatedly tried spiritual means
to resolve his alcoholic dilemma but had failed. But
when the broker gave him Dr. Silkworth's description
of alcoholism and its hopelessness, the physician began
to pursue the spiritual remedy for his malady with a
willingness he had never before been able to muster.
He sobered, never to drink again up to the moment of
his death in 1950. This seemed to prove that one
alcoholic could affect another as no nonalcoholic
FORWARD xvii
could. It also indicated that strenuous work, one
alcoholic with another, was vital to permanent re
covery.
Hence the two men set to work almost frantically
upon alcoholics arriving in the ward of the Akron
City Hospital. Their very first case, a desperate one,
recovered immediately and became A.A. number
three. He never had another drink. This work at
Akron continued through the summer of 1935. There
were many failures, but there was an occasional heart
ening success. When the broker returned to New York
in the fall of 1935, the first A.A. group had actually
been formed, though no one realized it at the time.
By late 1937, the number of members having sub-
stantial sobriety time behind them was sufficient to
convince the membership that a new light had entered.
A second small group had promptly taken shape at
New York, And besides, there were scattered alco-
holics who had picked up the basic ideas in Akron or
New York and were trying to form A.A. groups in
other cities.
It was now time, the struggling groups thought, to
place their message and unique experience before the
world. This determination bore fruit in the spring of
1939 by the publication of this volume. The member
ship had then reached about 100 men and women.
The fledgling society, which had been nameless, now
began to be called Alcoholics Anonymous, from the
title of its own book. The flying blind period ended
and A.A. entered a new phase of its pioneering time.
With the appearance of the new book a great deal
began to happen. Dr. Harry Emerson Fosdick, the
xviii FORWARD
noted clergyman, reviewed it with approval. In the
fall of 1939 Fulton Oursler, the editor of Liberty,
printed a piece in his magazine, called "Alcoholics and
God." This brought a rush of 800 frantic inquiries
into the little New York office which meanwhile had
been established. Each inquiry was painstakingly
answered; pamphlets and books were sent out. Busi
nessmen, traveling out of existing groups, were
referred to these prospective newcomers. New groups
started up and it was found, to the astonishment of
everyone, that A.A.'s message could be transmitted in
the mail as well as by word of mouth. By the end of
1939 it was estimated that 800 alcoholics were on
their way to recovery.
In the spring of 1940, John D. Rockefeller, Jr. gave
a dinner for many of his friends to which he invited
A.A. members to tell their stories. News of this got on
the world wires; inquiries poured in again and many
people went to the bookstores to get the book "Alco-
holics Anonymous." By March 1941 the membership
had shot up to 2,000. Then Jack Alexander wrote a
feature article in the Saturday Evening Post and
placed such a compelling picture of A.A. before the
general public that alcoholics in need of help really
deluged us. By the close of 1941, A.A. numbered 8,000
members. The mushrooming process was in full swing,
A.A. had become a national institution.
Our Society then entered a fearsome and exciting
adolescent period. The test that it faced was this:
Could these large numbers of erstwhile erratic alco
holics successfully meet and work together? Would
there be quarrels over membership, leadership and
money? Would there be striving for power and
FORWARD xix
prestige? Would There be schisms which would split
A.A. apart? Soon A.A. was beset by these very probl
ems on every side and in every group. But out of this
frightening and at first disrupting experience the con
viction grew that A.A.'s had to hang together or die
separately. We had to unify our Fellowship or pass
off the scene.
As we discovered the principles by which the indi
vidual alcoholic could live, so we had to evolve prin
ciples by which the A.A. groups and A.A. as a whole
could survive and function effectively. It was thought
that no alcoholic man or woman could be excluded
from our Society; that our leaders might serve but
not govern; that each group was to be autonomous
and There was to be no professional class of therapy.
There were to be no fees or dues; our expenses were
to be met by our own voluntary contributions. There
was to be the least possible organization, even in our
service centers. Our public relations were to be based
upon attraction rather than promotion. It was decided
that all members ought to be anonymous at the level
of press, radio, TV and films. And in no circumstances
should we give endorsements, make alliances, or enter
public controversies.
This was the substance of A.A.'s Twelve Traditions,
which are stated in full on page 564 of this book.
Though none of these principles had the force of rules
or laws, they had become so widely accepted by 1950
that they were confirmed by our first International
Conference held at Cleveland. Today the remarkable
unity of A.A. is one of the greatest assets that our
Society has.
While the internal difficulties of our adolescent
xx FORWARD
period were being ironed out, public acceptance of
A.A. grew by leaps and bounds. For this There were
two principal reasons: the large numbers of recoveries,
and reunited homes.
Another reason for the wide acceptance of A.A. was
the ministration of friends friends in medicine,
religion, and the press, together with innumerable
others who became our able and persistent advocates.
Without such support, A.A. could have made only the
slowest progress. Some of the recommendations of
A.A.'s early medical and religious friends will be found
further on in this book.
Alcoholics Anonymous is not a religious organiza
tion. Neither does A.A. take any particular medical
point of view, though we cooperate widely with the
men of medicine as well as with the men of religion.
Alcohol being no respecter of persons, we are an
accurate cross section of America, and in distant lands,
the same democratic evening up process is now going
on. By personal religious affiliation, we include Catho
lics, Protestants, Jews, Hindus, and a sprinkling of
Moslems and Buddhists. More than fifteen percent of
us are women.
So far, upon the total problem of actual poten
tial alcoholics in the world, we have made only a
scratch. In all probability, we shall never be able to
touch more than a fair fraction of the alcohol problem
in all its ramifications. Upon therapy for the alcoholic
himself, we surely have no monopoly. Yet it is our great
hope that all those who have as yet found no answer
may begin to find one in the pages of this book and
will presently join us on the highroad to a new freed
om.
By March
1976, when this edition went to the
printer, the total worldwide membership of Alco
holics Anonymous was conservatively estimated at
more than 1,000,000, with almost 28,000 groups meet
ing in over 90 countries.
Surveys of groups in the United States and Canada
indicate that A.A. is reaching out, not only to more
and more people, but to a wider and wider range.
Women now make up more than one fourth of the
membership; among newer members, the proportion is
nearly one third. Seven percent of the A.A.'s surveyed
are less than thirty years of age among them, many in
their teens.
The basic principles of the A.A. program, it appears,
hold good for individuals with many different life
styles, just as the program has brought recovery to
those of many different nationalities. The Twelve Steps
that summarize the program may be called Los Dose
Pasosin one country, les Douse Etapes in another, but
they trace exactly the same path to recovery that was
blazed by the earliest members of Alcoholics Anonymous.
In spite of the great increase in the size and the
span of this Fellowship, at its core it remains simple
and personal. Each day, somewhere in the world, re
covery begins when one alcoholic talks with another
alcoholic, sharing experience, strength, and hope.
xxi
We of Alcoholics Anonymous believe that the
reader will be interested in the medical esti
mate of the plan of recovery described in this book.
Convincing testimony must surely come from medical
men who have had experience with the sufferings of
our members and have witnessed our return to health.
A well known doctor, chief physician at a nationally
prominent hospital specializing in alcoholic and drug
addiction, gave Alcoholics Anonymous this letter:
To Whom It May Concern:
I have specialized in the treatment of alcoholism
for many years.
In late 1934 I attended a patient who, though he had
been a competent business man of good earning ca
pacity, was an alcoholic of a type I had come to regard
as hopeless.
In the course of his third treatment he acquired
cer
tain ideas concerning a possible means of recovery. As
part of his rehabilitation he commenced to present his
conceptions to other alcoholics, impressing upon them
that they must do likewise with still others. This has
become the basis of a rapidly growing fellowship of
these men and their families. This man and over one
hundred others appear to have recovered.
I personally know scores of cases who were of the
type with whom other methods had failed completely.
These facts appear to be of extreme medical impor
tance; because of the extraordinary possibilities of rapid
xxiv THE DOCTOR'S OPINION
growth inherent in this group they may mark a new
epoch in the annals of alcoholism. These men may
well have a remedy for thousands of such situations.
You may rely absolutely on anything they say about
themselves.
Very truly yours,
(Signed) William D. Silkworth,M.D.
The physician who, at our request, gave us this let
ter, has been kind enough to enlarge upon hi views in
another statement which follows. In this statement he
confirms what we who have suffered alcoholic torture
must believe that the body of the alcoholic is quite as
abnormal as his mind. It did not satisfy us to be told
that we could not control our drinking just because we
were maladjusted to life, that we were in full flight
from reality, or were outright mental defectives. These
things were true to some extent, in fact, to a consider
able extent with some of us. But we are sure that our
bodies were sickened as well. In our belief, any pic
ture of the alcoholic which leaves out this physical factor
is incomplete.
The doctor's theory that we have an allergy to al
cohol interests us. As laymen, our opinion as to its
soundness may, of course, mean little. But as ex
problem drinkers, we can say that his explanation
makes good sense. It explains many things for which
we cannot otherwise account.
Though we work out our solution on the spiritual as
well as an altruistic plane, we favor hospitalization for
the alcoholic who is very jittery or befogged. More
often than not, it is imperative that a man's brain be
cleared before he is approached, as he has then a bet
THE DOCTOR'S OPINION xxv
ter chance of understanding and accepting what we have to offer.
The doctor writes:
The subject presented in this book seems to me to be
of
paramount importance to those afflicted with alcoholic
addiction.
I say this after many years' experience as Medical
Director of one of the oldest hospitals in the country treat
ing alcoholic and drug addiction.
There was, therefore, a sense of real satisfaction
when I
was asked to contribute a few words on a subject which is
covered in such masterly detail in these pages.
We doctors have realized for a long time that some
form
of moral psychology was of urgent importance to alcoholics,
but its application presented difficulties beyond our concep
tion. What with our ultramodern standards, our scientific
approach to everything, we are perhaps not well equipped
to apply the powers of good that lie outside our synthetic
knowledge.
Many years ago one of the leading contributors to
this
book came under our care in this hospital and while here
he acquired some ideas which he put into practical applica
tion at once.
Later, he requested the privilege of being allowed to
tell
his story to other patients here and with some misgiving,
we consented. The cases we have followed through have
been most interesting; in fact, many of them are amazing.
The unselfishness of these men as we have come to know
them, the entire absence of profit motive, and their com
munity spirit, is indeed inspiring to one who has labored
long and wearily in this alcoholic field. They believe in
themselves, and still more in the Power which pulls chronic
alcoholics back from the gates of death.
Of course an alcoholic ought to be freed from his
physical
xxvi THE DOCTOR'S OPINION
craving for liquor, and this often requires a definite hospital
procedure, before psychological measures can be of maxi
mum benefit.
We believe, and so suggested a few years ago, that
the
action of alcohol on these chronic alcoholics is a manifestat
ion of an allergy; that the phenomenon of craving is limited
to this class and never occurs in the average temperate
drinker. These allergic types can never safely use alcohol
in any form at all; and once having formed the habit and
found they cannot break it, once having lost their self
confidence, their reliance upon things human, their prob
lems pile up on them and become astonishingly difficult
to solve.
Frothy emotional appeal seldom suffices. The message
which can interest and hold these alcoholic people must
have depth and weight. In nearly all cases, their ideals
must be grounded in a power greater than themselves, if
they are to recreate their lives.
If any feel that as psychiatrists directing a
hospital for
alcoholics we appear somewhat sentimental, let them stand
with us a while on the firing line, see the tragedies, the
despairing wives, the little children; let the solving of these
problems become a part of their daily work, and even of
their sleeping moments, and the most cynical will not
wonder that we have accepted and encouraged this move
ment. We feel, after many years of experience, that we
have found nothing which has contributed more to the
rehabilitation of these men than the altruistic movement
now growing up among them.
Men and women drink essentially because they like the
effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that,
while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time
differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alco
holic life seems the only normal one. They are restless,
irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience
THE DOCTOR'S OPINION xxvii
the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by tak
ing a few drinks drinks which they see others taking with
impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again,
as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops,
they pass through the well known stages of a spree, emerg
ing remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again.
This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can
experience an entire psychic change There is very little hope
of his recovery.
On the other hand and strange as this may seem to
those
who do not understand once a psychic change has occurred,
the very same person who seemed doomed, who had so
many problems he despaired of ever solving them, suddenly
finds himself easily able to control his desire for alcohol,
the only effort necessary being that required to follow a
few simple rules.
Men have cried out to me in sincere and despairing
ap
peal: "Doctor, I cannot go on like this! I have everything
to live for! I must stop, but I cannot! You must help me!"
Faced with this problem, if a doctor is honest with
him
self, he must sometimes feel his own inadequacy. Although
he gives all that is in him, it often is not enough. One feels
that something more than human power is needed to pro-
duce the essential psychic change. Though the aggregate
of recoveries resulting from psychiatric effort is consider-
able, we physicians must admit we have made little
impression upon the problem as a whole. Many types do
not respond to the ordinary psychological approach.
I do not hold with those who believe that alcoholism
is
entirely a problem of mental control. I have had many
men who had, for example, worked a period of months
on some problem or business deal which was to be settled on
a certain date, favorably to them. They took a drink a day
or so prior to the date, and then the phenomenon of craving
at once became paramount to all other interests so that the
xxviii THE DOCTOR'S OPINION
important appointment was not met. These men were not
drinking to escape; they were drinking to overcome a crav
ing beyond their mental control.
There are many situations which arise out of the
phenom
enon of craving which cause men to make the supreme
sacrifice rather than continue to fight.
The classification of alcoholics seems most
difficult, and
in much detail is outside the scope of this book. There are,
of course, the psychopaths who are emotionally unstable.
We are all familiar with this type. They are always "going
on the wagon for keeps." They are overremorseful and
make many resolutions, but never a decision.
There is the type of man who is unwilling to admit
that
he cannot take a drink. He plans various ways of drinking.
He changes his brand or his environment. There is the type
who always believes that after being entirely free from
alcohol for a period of time he can take a drink without
danger. There is the manicdepressive type, who is, per
haps, the least understood by his friends, and about whom
a whole chapter could be written.
Then There are types entirely normal in every respect
except in the effect alcohol has upon them. They are often
able, intelligent, friendly people.
All these, and many others, have one symptom in com
mon: they cannot start drinking without developing the
phenomenon of craving. This phenomenon, as we have
suggested, may be the manifestation of an allergy which
differentiates these people, and sets them apart as a distinct
entity. It has never been, by any treatment with which we
are familiar, permanently eradicated. The only relief we
have to suggest is entire abstinence.
This immediately precipitates us into a seething
caldron
of debate. Much has been written pro and con, but among
physicians, the general opinion seems to be that most
chronic alcoholics are doomed.
THE DOCTOR'S OPINION xxix
What is the solution? Perhaps I can best answer
this by
relating one of my experiences.
About one year prior to this experience a man was
brought in to be treated for chronic alcoholism. He had
but partially recovered from a gastric hemorrhage and
seemed to be a case of pathological mental deterioration.
He had lost everything worth while in life and was
only
living, one might say, to drink. He frankly admitted and
believed that for him There was no hope. Following the
elimination of alcohol, There was found to be no permanent
brain injury. He accepted the plan outlined in this book.
One year later he called to see me, and I experienced a
very strange sensation. I knew the man by name, and
partly recognized his features, but there all resemblance
ended. From a trembling, despairing, nervous wreck, had
emerged a man brimming over with selfreliance and con
tentment. I talked with him for some time, but was not
able to bring myself to feel that I had known him before.
To me he was a stranger, and so he left me. A long time
has passed with no return to alcohol.
When I need a mental uplift, I often think of another
case brought in by a physician prominent in New York
City. The patient had made his own diagnosis, and deciding his
situation hopeless, had hidden in a deserted barn deter
mined to die. He was rescued by a searching party, and,
in desperate condition, brought to me. Following his
physical rehabilitation, he had a talk with me in which he
frankly stated he thought the treatment a waste of effort,
unless I could assure him, which no one ever had, that in
the future he would have the "will power" to resist
the impulse to drink.
His alcoholic problem was so complex, and his
depres
sion so great, that we felt his only hope would be through
what we then called "moral psychology," and we doubted
if even that would have any effect.
xxx THE DOCTOR'S OPINION
However, he did become
"sold" on the ideas contained
in this book. He has not had a drink for a great many years.
I see him now and then and he is as fine a specimen of
manhood as one could wish to meet.
I earnestly advise every alcoholic to read this book
through, and though perhaps he came to scoff, he may re-
main to pray.
William D. Silkworth, MD
Chapter 1
BILL'S STORY
War fever ran high in the New
England town
to which we new, young officers from Platts
burg were assigned, and we were flattered when the
first citizens took us to their homes, making us feel
heroic. Here was love, applause, war; moments sub
lime with intervals hilarious. I was part of life at last,
and in the midst of the excitement I discovered liquor.
I forgot the strong warnings and the prejudices of my
people concerning drink. In time we sailed for "Over
There." I was very lonely and again turned to alcohol.
We landed in England. I visited Winchester Cathe
dral. Much moved, I wandered outside. My attention
was caught by a doggerel on an old tombstone:
"Here lies a Hampshire Grenadier
Who caught his death
Drinking cold small beer.
A good soldier is ne'er forgot
Whether he dieth by musket
Or by pot."
Ominous warnings which I failed to heed.
Twentytwo, and a veteran of foreign wars, I went
home at last. I fancied myself a leader, for had not the
men of my battery given me a special token of appre
ciation? My talent for leadership, I imagined, would
place me at the head of vast enterprises which I would
manage with the utmost assurance.
1
2 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
I took a night law course, and obtained employment
as investigator for a surety company. The drive for
success was on. I'd prove to the world I was import
ant. My work took me about Wall Street and little by
little I became interested in the market. Many people
lost money but some became very rich. Why not I?
I studied economics and business as well as law. Po
tential alcoholic that I was, I nearly failed my law
course. At one of the finals I was too drunk to think or
write. Though my drinking was not yet continuous, it
disturbed my wife. We had long talks when I would
still her forebodings by telling her that men of genius
conceived their best projects when drunk; that the
most majestic constructions philosophic thought
were so derived.
By the time I had completed the course, I knew the
law was not for me. The inviting maelstrom of Wall
Street had me in its grip. Business and financial lead
ers were my heroes. Out of this ally of drink and
speculation, I commenced to forge the weapon that
one day would turn in its flight like a boomerang and
all but cut me to ribbons. Living modestly, my wife
and I saved $1,000. It went into certain securities,
then cheap and rather unpopular. I rightly imagined
that they would some day have a great rise. I failed to
persuade my broker friends to send me out looking
over factories and managements, but my wife and I de
cided to go anyway. I had developed a theory that
most people lost money in stocks through ignorance
of markets. I discovered many more reasons later on.
We gave up our positions and off we roared on a
motorcycle, the sidecar stuffed with tent, blankets, a
change of clothes, and three huge volumes of a finan
BILL'S STORY 3
cial reference service. Our friends thought a lunacy
commission should be appointed. Perhaps they were
right. I had some success at speculation, so we
had a little money, but we once worked on a farm for
a month to avoid drawing on our small capital. That
was the last honest manual labor on my part for many
a day. We covered the whole eastern United States in
a year. At the end of it, my reports to Wall Street
procured me a position there and the use of a large ex
pense account. The exercise of an option brought in
more money, leaving us with a profit of several thou
sand dollars for that year.
For the next few years fortune threw money and ap
plause my way. I had arrived. My judgment and
ideas were followed by many to the tune of paper mil
lions. The great boom of the late twenties was seeth
ing and swelling. Drink was taking an important and
exhilarating part in my life. There was loud talk in
the jazz places uptown. Everyone spent in thousands
and chattered in millions. Scoffers could scoff and be
damned. I made a host of fairweather friends.
My drinking assumed more serious proportions, con
tinuing all day and almost every night. The remon
strances of my friends terminated in a row and I
became a lone wolf. There were many unhappy scenes
in our sumptuous apartment. There had been no real
infidelity, for loyalty to my wife, helped at times by
extreme drunkenness, kept me out to those scrapes.
In 1929 I contracted golf fever. We went at once
to the country, my wife to applaud while I started out
to overtake Walter Hagen. Liquor caught up with me
much faster than I came up behind Walter. I began
to be jittery in the morning. Golf permitted drinking
4 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
every day and every night. It was fun to carom around
the exclusive course which had inspired such awe in
me as a lad. I acquired the impeccable coat of tan
one sees upon the welltodo. The local banker
watched me whirl fat checks in and out of his till with
amused skepticism.
Abruptly in October 1929 hell broke loose on the
New York stock exchange. After one of those days of
inferno, I wobbled from a hotel bar to a brokerage
office. It was eight o'clock, five hours after the market
closed. The ticker still clattered. I was staring at an
inch of the tape which bore the inscription XYZ32. It
had been 52 that morning. I was finished and so were
many friends. The papers reported men jumping to
death from the towers of High Finance. That dis
gusted me. I would not jump. I went back to the bar.
My friends had dropped several million since ten
o'clock so what? Tomorrow was another day. As I
drank, the old fierce determination to win came back.
Next morning I telephoned a friend in Montreal.
He had plenty of money left and thought I had better
go to Canada. By the following spring we were living
in our accustomed style. I felt like Napoleon returning
from Elba. No St. Helena for me! But drinking caught
up with me again and my generous friend had to let
me go. This time we stayed broke.
We went to live with my wife's parents. I found a
job; then lost it as the result of a brawl with a taxi
driver. Mercifully, no one could guess that I was to
have no real employment for five years, or hardly draw
a sober breath. My wife began to work in a depart
ment store, coming home exhausted to find me drunk.
BILL'S STORY 5
I became an unwelcome hangeron at brokerage
places.
Liquor ceased to be a luxury; it became a necessity.
"Bathtub" gin, two bottles a day, and often three, got
to be routine. Sometimes a small deal would net a few
hundred dollars, and I would pay my bills at the bars
and delicatessens. This went on endlessly, and I began
to waken very early in the morning shaking violently.
A tumbler full of gin followed by half a dozen bottles
of beer would be required if I were to eat any break
fast. Nevertheless, I still thought I could control the
situation, and there were periods of sobriety which
renewed my wife's hope.
Gradually things got worse. The house was taken
over by the mortgage holder, my motherinlaw died,
my wife and fatherinlaw became ill.
Then I got a promising business opportunity. Stocks
were at the low point of 1932, and I had somehow
formed a group to buy. I was to share generously in
the profits. Then I went on a prodigious bender, and
that chance vanished.
I woke up. This had to be stopped. I saw I could
not take so much as one drink. I was through forever.
Before then, I had written lots of sweet promises, but
my wife happily observed that this time I meant busi
ness. And so I did.
Shortly afterward I came home drunk. There had
been no fight. Where had been my high resolve? I
simply didn't know. It hadn't even come to mind.
Someone had pushed a drink my way, and I had taken
it. Was I crazy? I began to wonder, for such an ap
palling lack of perspective seemed near being just that.
Renewing my resolve, I tried again. Some time
6 ALCOHOLIC'S ANONYMOUS
passed, and confidence began to be replaced by cock
sureness. I could laugh at the gin mills. Now I had
what it takes! One day I walked into a cafe to tele
phone. In no time I was beating on the bar asking my
self how it happened. As the whisky rose to my head
I told myself I would manage better next time, but I
might as well get good and drunk then. And I did.
The remorse, horror and hopelessness of the next
morning are unforgettable. The courage to do battle
was not there. My brain raced uncontrollably and
There was a terrible sense of impending calamity. I
hardly dared cross the street, lest I collapse and be run
down by an early morning truck, for it was scarcely
daylight. An all night place supplied me with a dozen
glasses of ale. My writhing nerves were stilled at last.
A morning paper told me the market had gone to hell
again. Well, so had I . The market would recover, but
I wouldn't. That was a hard thought. Should I kill
myself? No not now. Then a mental fog settled
down. Gin would fix that. So two bottles, and
oblivion.
The mind and body are marvelous mechanisms, for
mine endured this agony two more years. Sometimes
I stole from my wife's slender purse when the morning
terror and madness were on me. Again I swayed diz
zily before an open window, or the medicine cabinet
where There was poison, cursing myself for a weakling.
There were flights from city to country and back, as
my wife and I sought escape. Then came the night
when the physical and mental torture was so hellish I
feared I would burst through my window, sash and
all. Somehow I managed to drag my mattress to a
lower floor, lest I suddenly leap. A doctor came
BILL'S STORY 7
with a heavy sedative. Next day found me drinking both
gin and sedative. This combination soon landed me
on the rocks. People feared for my sanity. So did I.
I could eat little or nothing when drinking, and I was
forty pounds under weight.
My brotherinlaw is a physician, and through his
kindness and that of my mother I was placed in a na
tionallyknown hospital for the mental and physical
rehabilitation of alcoholics. Under the socalled bella
donna treatment my brain cleared. Hydrotherapy and
mild exercise helped much. Best of all, I met a kind
doctor who explained that though certainly selfish and
foolish, I had been seriously ill, bodily and mentally.
It relieved me somewhat to learn that in alcoholics
the will is amazingly weakened when it comes to com
bating liquor, though if often remains strong in other
respects. My incredible behavior in the face of a
desperate desire to stop was explained. Understand
ing myself now, I fared forth in high hope. For three
or four months the goose hung high. I went to town
regularly and even made a little money. Surely this
was the answer, selfknowledge.
But it was not, for the frightful day came when I
drank once more. The curve of my declining moral
and bodily health fell off like a skijump. After a time
I returned to the hospital. This was the finish, the cur
tain, it seemed to me. My weary and despairing wife
was informed that it would all end with heart failure
during delirium tremens, or I would develop a wet
brain, perhaps within a year. We would soon have to
give me over to the undertaker of the asylum.
They did not need to tell me. I knew, and almost
welcomed the idea. It was a devastating blow to my
8 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
pride. I, who had thought so well of myself and my
abilities, of my capacity to surmount obstacles, was
cornered at last. Now I was to plunge into the dark,
joining that endless procession of sots who had gone
on before. I thought of my poor wife. There had been
much happiness after all. What would I not give to
make amends. But that was over now.
No words can tell of the loneliness and despair I
found in that bitter morass of selfpity. Quicksand
stretched around me in all directions. I had met my
match. I had been overwhelmed. Alcohol was my
master.
Trembling, I stepped from the hospital a broken
man. Fear sobered me for a bit. Then came the insidi
ous insanity of that first drink, and on Armistice Day
1934, I was off again. Everyone became resigned to
the certainty that I would have to be shut up some
where, or would stumble along to a miserable end.
How dark it is before the dawn! In reality that was
the beginning of my last debauch. I was soon to be
catapulted into what I like to call the fourth dimension
of existence. I was to know happiness, peace, and
usefulness, in a way of life that is incredibly more
wonderful as time passes.
Near the end of that bleak November, I sat drinking
in my kitchen. With a certain satisfaction I reflected
There was enough gin concealed about the house to
carry me through that night and the next day. My
wife was at work. I wondered whether I dared hide a
full bottle of gin near the head of our bed. I would
need it before daylight.
My musing was interrupted by the telephone. The
cheery voice of an old school friend asked if he might
BILL'S STORY 9
come over. He was sober. It was years since I could
remember his coming to New York in that condition.
I was amazed. Rumor had it that he had been com
mitted for alcoholic insanity. I wondered how he had
escaped. Of course he would have dinner, and then I
could drink openly with him. Unmindful of his wel
fare, I thought only of recapturing the spirit of other
days. There was that time we had chartered an air
plane to complete a jag! His coming was an oasis in
this dreary desert of futility. The very thing, an oasis!
Drinkers are like that.
The door opened and he stood there, freshskinned
and glowing. There was something about his eyes. He
was inexplicably different. What had happened?
I pushed a drink across the table. He refused it.
Disappointed but curious, I wondered what had got
into the fellow. He wasn't himself.
"Come, what's all this about? I queried.
He looked straight at me. Simply, but smilingly, he
said, "I've got religion."
I was aghast. So that was it, last summer an alco
holic crackpot; now, I suspected, a little cracked about
religion. He had that starryeyed look. Yes, the old
boy was on fire all right. But bless his heart, let him
rant! Besides, my gin would last longer than his
preaching.
But he did no ranting. In a matter of fact way he
told how two men had appeared in court, persuading
the judge to suspend his commitment. They had told
of a simple religious idea and a practical program of
action. That was two months ago and the result was
selfevident. It worked!
He had come to pass his experience along to meif
10 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
I cared to have it. I was shocked, but interested.
Cer
tainly I was interested. I had to be, for I was hopeless.
He talked for hours. Childhood memories rose be
fore me. I could almost hear the sound of the preach
er's voice as I sat, on still Sundays, way over there on
the hillside; there was that proffered temperance
pledge I never signed; my grandfather's good natured
contempt of some church fold and their doings; his
insistence that the spheres really had their music; but
his denial of the preacher's right to tell him how he
must listen; his fearlessness as he spoke of these things
just before he died; these recollections welled up from
the past. They made me swallow hard.
That wartime day in old Winchester Cathedral
came back again.
I had always believed in a Power greater that my
self. I had often pondered these things. I was not an
atheist. Few people really are, for that means blind
faith in the strange proposition that this universe orig
inated in a cipher and aimlessly rushes nowhere. My
intellectual heroes, the chemists, the astronomers, even
the evolutionist, suggested vast laws and forces at
work. Despite contrary indications, I had little doubt
that a might purpose and rhythm underlay all. How
could there be so much of precise and immutable law,
and no intelligence? I simply had to believe in a Spirit
of the Universe, who knew neither time nor limitation.
But that was as far as I had gone.
With ministers, and the world's religions, I parted
right there. When they talked of a God personal to
me, who was love, superhuman strength and direction,
I became irritated and my mind snapped shut against
such a theory.
BILL'S STORY 11
To Christ I conceded the certainty of a great man,
not too closely followed by those who claimed Him.
His moral teaching, most excellent. For myself, I had
adopted those parts which seemed convenient and not
too difficult; the rest I disregarded.
The wars which had been fought, the burnings and
chicanery that religious dispute had facilitated, made
me sick. I honestly doubted whether, on balance, the
religions of mankind had done any good. Judging
from what I had seen in Europe and since, the power
of God in human affairs was negligible, the Brother
hood of Man a grim jest. If there was a Devil, he
seemed the Boss Universal, and he certainly had me.
But my friend sat before me, and he made the point
blank declaration that God had done for him what he
could not do for himself. His human will had failed.
Doctors had pronounced him incurable. Society was
about to lock him up. Like myself, he had admitted
complete defeat. Then he had, in effect, been raised
from the dead, suddenly taken from the scrap heap to
a level of life better than the best he had ever known!
Had this power originated in him? Obviously it had
not. There had been no more power in him than there
was in me at that minute; and this was none at all.
That floored me. It began to look as though reli
gious people were right after all. Here was something
at work in a human heart which had done the impos
sible. My ideas about miracles were drastically revised
right then. Never mind the musty past; here sat a
miracle directly across the kitchen table. He shouted
great tidings.
I saw that my friend was much more than inwardly
12 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
reorganized. He was on different footing. His roots
grasped a new soil.
Despite the living example of my friend There re
mained in me the vestiges of my old prejudice. The
word God still aroused a certain antipathy. When the
thought was expressed that there might be a God per
sonal to me this feeling was intensified. I didn't like
the idea. I could go for such conceptions as Creative
Intelligence, Universal Mind or Spirit of Nature but I
resisted the thought of a Czar of the Heavens, however
loving His sway might be. I have since talked with
scores of men who felt the same way.
My friend suggested what then seemed a novel idea.
He said, "Why don't you choose your own conception
of God?"
That statement hit me hard. It melted the icy intel
lectual mountain in whose shadow I had lived and
shivered many years. I stood in the sunlight at last.
It was only a matter of being willing to believe in a
Power greater than myself. Nothing more was required
of me to make my beginning. I saw that growth could
start from that point. Upon a foundation of complete
willingness I might build what I saw in my friend.
Would I have it? Of course I would!
Thus was I convinced that God is concerned with us
humans when we want Him enough. At long last I
saw, I felt, I believed. Scales of pride and prejudice
fell from my eyes. A new world came into view.
The real significance of my experience in the Cathe
dral burst upon me. For a brief moment, I had needed
and wanted God. There had been a humble willing
ness to have Him with me, and He came. But soon
the sense of His presence had been blotted out by
BILL'S STORY 13
worldly clamors, mostly those within myself. And so
it had been ever since. How blind I had been.
At the hospital I was separated from alcohol for the
last time. Treatment seemed wise, for I showed signs
of delirium tremens.
There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then
I understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed
myself unreservedly under His care and direction. I
admitted for the first time that of myself I was noth
ing; that without Him I was lost. I ruthlessly faced my
sins and became willing to have my newfound Friend
take them away, root and branch. I have not had a
drink since.
My schoolmate visited me, and I fully acquainted him
with my problems and deficiencies. We made a
list of people I had hurt or toward whom I felt resent
ment. I expressed my entire willingness to approach
these individuals, admitting my wrong. Never was I
to be critical of them. I was to right all such matters
to the utmost of my ability.
I was to test my thinking by the new Godconscious
ness within. Common sense would thus become un
common sense. I was to sit quietly when in doubt,
asking only for direction and strength to meet my
problems as He would have me. Never was I to pray
for myself, except as my requests bore on my useful
ness to others. Then only might I expect to receive.
But that would be in great measure.
My friend promised when these things were done I
would enter upon a new relationship with my Creator;
that I would have the elements of a way of living
which answered all my problems. Belief in the power
of God, plus enough willingness, honesty and humility
14 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
to establish and maintain the new order of things, were
the essential requirements.
Simple, but not easy; a price had to be paid. It
meant destruction of selfcenteredness. I must turn
in all things to the Father of Light who presides over
us all.
These were revolutionary and drastic proposals, but
the moment I fully accepted them, the effect was elec
tric. There was a sense of victory, followed by such a
peace and serenity as I had never know. There was
utter confidence. I felt lifted up, as though the great
clean wind of a mountain top blew through and
through. God comes to most men gradually, but His
impact on me was sudden and profound.
For a moment I was alarmed, and called my friend,
the doctor, to ask if I were still sane. He listened in
wonder as I talked.
Finally he shook his head saying, "Something has
happened to you I don't understand. But you had
better hang on to it. Anything is better than the way
you were." The good doctor now sees many men who
have such experiences. He knows that they are real.
While I lay in the hospital the thought came that
there were thousands of hopeless alcoholics who might
be glad to have what had been so freely given me.
Perhaps I could help some of them. They in turn
might work with others.
My friend had emphasized the absolute necessity of
demonstrating these principles in all my affairs. Par
ticularly was it imperative to work with others as he
had worked with me. Faith without works was dead,
he said. And how appallingly true for the alcoholic!
For if an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his
BILL'S STORY 15
spiritual life through work and selfsacrifice for others,
he could not survive the certain trials and low spots
ahead. If he did not work, he would surely drink
again, and if he drank, he would surely die. Then faith
would be dead indeed. With us it is just like that.
My wife and I abandoned ourselves with enthusi
asm to the idea of helping other alcoholics to a solution
of their problems. It was fortunate, for my old busi
ness associates remained skeptical for a year and a
half, during which I found little work. I was not too
well at the time, and was plagued by waves of self
pity and resentment. This sometimes nearly drove me
back to drink, but I soon found that when all other
measure failed, work with another alcoholic would
save the day. Many times I have gone to my old hos
pital in despair. On talking to a man there, I would be
amazingly lifted up and set on my feet. It is a design
for living that works in rough going.
We commenced to make many fast friends and a fel
lowship has grown up among us of which it is a won
derful thing to feel a part. The joy of living we really
have, even under pressure and difficulty. I have seen
hundreds of families set their feet in the path that
really goes somewhere; have seen the most impossible
domestic situations righted; feuds and bitterness of all
sorts wiped out. I have seen men come out of asylums
and resume a vital place in the lives of their families
and communities. Business and professional men have
regained their standing. There is scarcely any form of
trouble and misery which has not been overcome
among us. In one western city and its environs There
are one thousand of us and our families. We meet fre
quently so that newcomers may find the fellowship
16 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
they seek. At these informal gatherings one may often
see from 50 to 200 persons. We are growing in num
bers and power.
An alcoholic in his cups is an unlovely creature.
Our struggles with them are variously strenuous,
comic, and tragic. One poor chap committed suicide
in my home. He could not, or would not see our way
of life.
There is, however, a vast amount of fun about it all.
I suppose some would be shocked at our seeming
worldliness and levity. But just underneath There is
deadly earnestness. Faith has to work twentyfour
hours a day in and through us, or we perish.
Most of us feel we need look no further for Utopia.
We have it with us right here and now. Each day my
friend's simple talk in our kitchen multiplies itself in
a widening circle of peace on earth and good will to
men.
Bill W., co-founder of A.A.
died January 24, 1971.
*A.A. is now composed of almost 30,000 groups (1977)
Chapter 2
We, of Alcoholics Anonymous, know
sands of men and women who were once
just as hopeless as Bill. Nearly all have recovered.
They have solved the drink problem.
We are average Americans. All sections of this
country and many of its occupations are represented,
as well as many political, economic, social, and reli
gious backgrounds. We are people who normally
would not mix. But there exists among us a fellowship,
a friendliness, and an understanding which is inde
scribably wonderful. We are like the passengers of a
great liner the moment after rescue from shipwreck
when camaraderie, joyousness and democracy pervade
the vessel from steerage to Captain's table. Unlike the
feelings of the ship's passengers, however, our joy in
escape from disaster does not subside as we go our in
dividual ways. The feeling of having shared in a com
mon peril is one element in the powerful cement
which binds us. But that in itself would never have
held us together as we are now joined.
The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we
have discovered a common solution. We have a way
out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which
we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. This
is the great news this book carries to those who suffer
from alcoholism.
17
18 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
An illness of this sort, and we have come to
believe
it an illness, involves those about us in a way no other
human sickness can. If a person has cancer all are
sorry for him and no one is angry or hurt. But not so
with the alcoholic illness, for with it there goes anni
hilation of all the things worth while in life. It engulfs
all whose lives touch the sufferer's. It brings misun
derstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity,
disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of
blameless children, sad wives and parentsanyone
can increase the list.
We hope this volume will inform and comfort those
who are, or who may be affected. There are many.
Highly competent psychiatrists who have dealt with
us have found it sometimes impossible to persuade an
alcoholic to discuss his situation without reserve.
Strangely enough, wives, parents and intimate friends
usually find us even more unapproachable than do the
psychiatrist and the doctor.
But the exproblem drinker who has found this
solu
tion, who is properly armed with facts about himself,
can generally win the entire confidence of another al
coholic in a few hours. Until such an understanding
is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished.
That the man who is making the approach has had
the same difficulty, that he obviously knows what he is
talking about, that his whole deportment shouts at the
new prospect that he is a man with a real answer, that
he has no attitude of Holier Than Thou, nothing what
ever except the sincere desire to be helpful; that there
are no fees to pay, no axes to grind, no people to
please, no lectures to be endured, these are the condi
THERE IS A SOLUTION 19
tions we have found most effective. After such an ap-
proach many take up their beds and walk again.
None of us makes a sole vocation of this work, nor
do we think its effectiveness would be increased if we
did. We feel that elimination of our drinking is but
a beginning. A much more important demonstration
of our principles lies before us in our respective homes,
occupations and affairs. All of us spend much of our
spare time in the sort of effort which we are going to
describe. A few are fortunate enough to be so situated
that they can give nearly all their time to the work.
If we keep on the way we are going there is little
doubt that much good will result, but the surface of
the problem would hardly be scratched. Those of us
who live in large cities are overcome by the reflection
that close by hundreds are dropping into oblivion
every day. Many could recover if they had the oppor
tunity we have enjoyed. How then shall we present
that which has been so freely given us?
We have concluded to publish an anonymous vol
ume setting forth the problem as we see it. We shall
bring to the task our combined experience and knowl
edge. This should suggest a useful program for any
one concerned with a drinking problem.
Of necessity there will have to be discussion of
matters medical, psychiatric, social, and religious. We
are aware that these matters are from their very na
ture, controversial. Nothing would please us so much
as to write a book which would contain no basis for
contention or argument. We shall do our utmost to
achieve that ideal. Most of us sense that real tolerance
of other people's shortcomings and viewpoints and a
respect for their opinions are attitudes which make us
20 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
more useful to others. Our very lives, as exproblem
drinkers, depend upon our constant thought of others
and how we may help meet their needs.
You may already have asked yourself why it is that
all of us became so very ill from drinking. Doubtless
you are curious to discover how and why, in the face
of expert opinion to the contrary, we have recovered
from a hopeless condition of mind and body. If you
are an alcoholic who wants to get over it, you may
already be asking "What do I have to do?"
It is the purpose of this book to answer such ques
tions specifically. We shall tell you what we have
done. Before going into a detailed discussion, it may
be well to summarize some points as we see them.
How many time people have said to us: "I can
take
it or leave it alone. Why can't he?" "Why don't you
drink like a gentleman or quit?" "That fellow can't
handle his liquor." "Why don't you try beer and
wine?" "Lay off the hard stuff." "His will power must
be weak." "He could stop if he wanted to." "She's
such a sweet girl, I should think he'd stop for her
sake." "The doctor told him that if he ever drank
again it would kill him, but there he is all lit up again."
Now these are commonplace observations on drink
ers which we hear all the time. Back of them is a
world of ignorance and misunderstanding. We see
that these expressions refer to people whose reactions
are very different from ours.
Moderate drinkers have little trouble in giving up
liquor entirely if they have good reason for it. They
can take it or leave it alone.
Then we have a certain type of hard drinker. He
may have the habit badly enough to gradually impair
THERE IS A SOLUTION 21
him physically and mentally. It may cause him to die
a few years before his time. If a sufficiently strong rea
son is ill health, falling in love, change of environment,
or the warning of a doctor is becomes operative, this
man can also stop or moderate, although he may find
It difficult and troublesome and may even need med
ical attention.
But what about the real alcoholic? He may start off
as a moderate drinker; he may or may not become a
continuous hard drinker; but at some stage of his
drinking career he begins to lose all control of his
liquor consumption, once he starts to drink.
Here is a fellow who has been puzzling you, espe
cially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredi
ble, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr.
Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He is seldom mildly intoxicated.
He is always more or less insanely drunk. His dispos
ition while drinking resembles his normal nature but
little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world.
Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes
disgustingly, and even dangerously antisocial. He has
a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong
moment, particularly when some important decision
must be made or engagement kept. He is often per
fectly sensible and well balanced concerning every
thing except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly
dishonest and selfish. He often possesses special abili
ties, skills, and aptitudes, and has a promising career
ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright
outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the
structure down on his head by a senseless series of
sprees. He is the fellow who goes to bed so intoxicated
he ought to sleep the clock around. Yet early next
22 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
morning he searches madly for the bottle he misplaced
the night before. If he can afford it, he may have
liquor concealed all over his house to be certain no
one gets his entire supply away from him to throw down
the waste pipe. As matters grow worse, he be
gins to use a combination of highpowered sedative
and liquor to quiet his nerves so he can go to work.
Then comes the day when he simply cannot make it
and gets drunk all over again. Perhaps he goes to a
doctor who gives him morphine or some sedative with
which to taper off. Then he begins to appear at hos
pitals and sanitariums.
This is by no means a comprehensive picture of the
true alcoholic, as our behavior patterns vary. But this
description should identify him roughly.
Why does he behave like this? If hundreds of ex
periences have shown him that one drink means an
other debacle with all its attendant suffering and
humiliation, why is it he takes that one drink? Why
can't he stay on the water wagon? What has become
of the common sense and will power that he still some
times displays with respect to other matters?
Perhaps there never will be a full answer to these
questions. Opinions vary considerably as to why the
alcoholic reacts differently from normal people. We
are not sure why, once a certain point is reached, little
can be done for him. We cannot answer the riddle.
We know that while the alcoholic keeps away from
drink, as he may do for months or years, he reacts
much like other men. We are equally positive that
once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system,
something happens, both in the bodily and mental
sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to
THERE IS A SOLUTION 23
stop. The experience of any alcoholic will abundantly
confirm this.
These observations would be academic and point
less if our friend never took the first drink, thereby
setting the terrible cycle in motion. Therefore, the
main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind,
rather than in his body. If you ask him why he started
on that last bender, the chances are he will offer you
any one of a hundred alibis. Sometimes these excuses
have a certain plausibility, but none of them really
makes sense in the light of the havoc an alcoholic's
drinking bout creates. They sound like the philosophy
of the man who, having a headache, beats himself on
the head with a hammer so that he can't feel the ache.
If you draw this fallacious reasoning to the attention
of an alcoholic, he will laugh it off, or become irri
tated and refuse to talk.
Once in a while he may tell the truth. And the
truth, strange to say, is usually that he has no more
idea why he took that first drink than you have. Some
drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied
part of the time. But in their hearts they really do not
know why they do it. Once this malady has a real
hold, they are a baffled lot. There is the obsession that
somehow, someday, they will beat the game. But they
often suspect they are down for the count.
How true this is, few realize. In a vague way their
families and friends sense that these drinkers are ab
normal, but everybody hopefully awaits the day when
the sufferer will rouse himself from his lethargy and
assert his power of will.
The tragic truth is that if the man be a real alco
holic, the happy day may not arrive. He has lost
24 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
control. At a certain point in the drinking of every
alcoholic, he passes into a state where the most power
ful desire to stop drinking is of absolutely no avail.
This tragic situation has already arrived in practically
every case long before it is suspected.
The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet
ob
scure, have lost the power of choice in drink. Our so
called will power becomes practically nonexistent.
We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our con
sciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suf
fering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago.
We are without defense against the first drink.
The almost certain consequences that follow taking
even a glass of beer do not crowd into the mind to
deter us. If these thoughts occur, they are hazy and
readily supplanted with the old threadbare idea that
this time we shall handle ourselves like other people.
There is a complete failure of the kind of defense that
keeps one from putting his hand on a hot stove.
The alcoholic may say to himself in the most casual
way, "It won't burn me this time, so here's how!" Or
perhaps he doesn't think at all. How often have some
of us begun to drink in this nonchalant way, and after
the third or fourth, pounded on the bar and said to
ourselves, "For God's sake, how did I ever get started
again?" Only to have that thought supplanted by
"Well, I'll stop with the sixth drink." Or "What's the
use anyhow?"
When this sort of thinking is fully established in an
individual with alcoholic tendencies, he has probably
placed himself beyond human aid, and unless locked
up, may die or to permanently insane. These stark
and ugly facts have been confirmed by legions of alco
THERE IS A SOLUTION 25
holics throughout history. But for the grace of God,
There would have been thousands more convincing
demonstrations. So many want to stop but cannot.
There is a solution. Almost none of us liked
the self
searching, the leveling of our pride, the confession of
shortcomings which the process requires for its suc
cessful consummation. But we saw that it really
worked in others, and we had come to believe in the
hopelessness and futility of life as we had been living
it. When, therefore, we were approached by those in
whom the problem had been solved, there was nothing
left for us but to pick up the simple kit of spiritual
tools laid at out feet. We have found much of heaven
and we have been rocketed into a fourth dimension of
existence of which we had not even dreamed.
The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That
we
have had deep and effective spiritual experiences*
which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward
life, toward our fellows and toward God's universe.
The central fact of our lives today is the absolute cer
tainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and
lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has
commenced to accomplish those things for us which
we could never do by ourselves.
If you are as seriously alcoholic as we were, we be
lieve there is no middleoftheroad solution. We were
in a position where life was becoming impossible, and
if we had passed into the region from which there is
no return through human aid, we had but two alterna
tives: One was to go on to the bitter end, blotting out
the consciousness of our intolerable situation as best
we could; and the other, to accept spiritual help. This
*Fully explainedAppendix II.
26 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
we did because we honestly wanted to, and were will
ing to make the effort.
A certain American business man had ability, good
sense, and high character. For years he had floundered
from one sanitarium to another. He had consulted the
best known American psychiatrists. Then he had gone
to Europe, placing himself in the care of a celebrated
physician (the psychiatrist, Dr. Jung) who prescribed
for him. Though experience had made him skeptical,
he finished his treatment with unusual confidence.
His physical and mental condition were unusually
good. Above all, he believed he had acquired such a
profound knowledge of the inner workings of his mind
and its hidden springs that relapse was unthinkable.
Nevertheless, he was drunk in a short time. More
baffling still, he could give himself no satisfactory ex
planation for his fall.
So he returned to this doctor, whom he admired,
and asked him pointblank why he could not recover.
He wished above all things to regain self-control. He
seemed quite rational and wellbalanced with respect
to other problems. Yet he had no control whatever
over alcohol. Why was this?
He begged the doctor to tell him the whole truth,
and he got it. In the doctor's judgment he was utterly
hopeless; he could never regain his position in society
and he would have to place himself under lock and
key or hire a bodyguard if he expected to live long.
That was a great physician's opinion.
But this man still lives, and is a free man. He does
not need a bodyguard nor is he confined. He can go
anywhere on this earth where other from men may go
THERE IS A SOLUTION 27
without disaster, provided he remains willing to main
tain a certain simple attitude.
Some of our alcoholic readers may think they can do
without spiritual help. Let us tell you the rest of the
conversation our friend had with his doctor.
The doctor said: "You have the mind of a chronic
alcoholic. I have never seen one single case recover,
where that state of mind existed to the extent that it
does in you." Our friend felt as though the gates of
hell had closed on him with a clang.
He said to the doctor, "Is there no
exception?"
"Yes," replied the doctor, "There is. Exceptions to
cases such as yours have been occurring since early
times. Here and there, once in a while, alcoholics
have had what are called vital spiritual experiences.
To me these occurrences are phenomena. They ap
pear to be in the nature of huge emotional displace
ments and rearrangements. Ideas, emotions, and
attitudes which were once the guiding forces of the
lives of these men are suddenly cast to one side, and a
completely new set of conceptions and motives begin
to dominate them. In fact, I have been trying to
produce some such emotional rearrangement within
you. With many individuals the methods which I em
ployed are successful, but I have never been successful
with an alcoholic of your description."*
Upon hearing this, our friend was somewhat re
lieved, for he reflected that, after all, he was a good
church member. This hope, however, was destroyed
by the doctor's telling him that while his religious
convictions were very good, in his case they did not
spell the necessary vital spiritual experience.
*For amplification see Appendix II.
28 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
Here was the terrible dilemma in which our friend
found himself when he had the extraordinary exper
ience, which as we have already told you, made him a
free man.
We, in our turn, sought the same escape with all the
desperation of drowning men. What seemed at first a
flimsy reed, has proved to be the loving and powerful
hand of God. A new life has been given us or, if you
prefer, "a design for living" that really works.
The distinguished American psychologist, William
James, in his book "Varieties of Religious Experience,"
indicates a multitude of ways in which men have dis
covered God. We have no desire to convince anyone
that there is only one way by which faith can be ac
quired. If what we have learned and felt and seen
means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever
our race, creed, or color are the children of a living
Creator with whom we may form a relationship upon
simple and understandable terms as soon as we are
willing and honest enough to try. Those having reli
gious affiliations will find here nothing disturbing to
their beliefs or ceremonies. There is no friction among
us over such matters.
We think it no concern of ours what religious bodies
our members identify themselves with as individuals.
this should be an entirely personal affair which each
one decides for himself in the light of past associations,
or his present choice. Not all of join religious
bodies, but most of us favor such memberships.
In the following chapter, there appears an explan
ation of alcoholism, as we understand it, then a chapter
addressed to the agnostic. Many who once were in
this class are now among our members. Surprisingly
THERE IS A SOLUTION 29
enough, we find such convictions no great obstacle
to a spiritual experience.
Further on, clearcut directions are given showing
how we recovered. These are followed by fortytwo
personal experiences.
Each individual, in the personal stories, describes
in
his own language and from his own point of view the
way he established his relationship with God. These
give a fair cross section of our membership and a clear
cut idea of what has actually happened in their lives.
We hope no one will consider these selfrevealing
accounts in bad taste. Our hope is that many alcoholic
men and women, desperately in need, will see these
pages, and we believe that it is only by fully disclos
ing ourselves and our problems that they will be
persuaded to say, "Yes, I am one of them too; I must
have this thing."
Chapter 3
Most of us have been unwilling to admit we
were real alcoholics. No person likes to think
he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows.
Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers
have been characterized by countless vain attempts
to prove we could drink like other people. The idea
that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his
drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal
drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing.
Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death.
We learned that we had to fully concede to our in
nermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is the
first step in recovery. The delusion that we are like
other people, or presently may be, has to be smashed.
We alcoholics are men and women who have lost
the ability to control our drinking. We know that no
real alcoholic ever recovers control. All of us felt at
times that we were regaining control, but such inter
vals is usually brief is were inevitably followed by still
less control, which led in time to pitiful and incompre
hensible demoralization. We are convinced to a man
that alcoholics of our type are in the grip of a progres
sive illness. Over any considerable period we get
worse, never better.
We are like men who have lost their legs; they
never grow new ones. Neither does there appear to be
any kind of treatment which will make alcoholics of
30
MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM 31
our kind like other men. We have tried every imagin
able remedy. In some instances there has been brief
recovery, followed always by a still worse relapse.
Physicians who are familiar with alcoholism agree
There is no such thing a making a normal drinker out
of an alcoholic. Science may one day accomplish this,
but it hasn't done so yet.
Despite all we can say, many who are real alcoholics
are not going to believe they are in that class. By
every form of selfdeception and experimentation, they
will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule,
therefore nonalcoholic. If anyone who is showing
inability to control his drinking can do the right
aboutface and drink like a gentleman, our hats are
off to him. Heaven knows, we have tried hard enough
and long enough to drink like other people!
Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drink
ing beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never
drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drink
ing only at home, never having it in the house, never
drinking during business hours, drinking only at
parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking
only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on
the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off
forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more
physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going
to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary
commitment to asylums, we could increase the list
ad infinitum.
We do not like to pronounce any individual as alco
holic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself, step
over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled
drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it
32 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
more than once. It will not take long for you to de
cide, if you are honest with yourself about it. It may
be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowl
edge of your condition.
Though there is no way of proving it, we believe
that early in our drinking careers most of us could
have stopped drinking. But the difficulty is that few
alcoholics have enough desire to stop while there is
yet time. We have heard of a few instances where
people, who showed definite signs of alcoholism, were
able to stop for a long period because of an overpow
ering desire to do so. Here is one.
A man of thirty was doing a great deal of spree
drinking. He was very nervous in the morning after
these bouts and quieted himself with more liquor. He
was ambitious to succeed in business, but saw that he
would get nowhere if he drank at all. Once he started,
he had no control whatever. He made up his mind
that until he had been successful in business and had
retired, he would not touch another drop. An excep
tional man, he remained bone dry for twentyfive
years and retired at the age of fiftyfive, after a suc
cessful and happy business career. Then he fell vic
tim to a belief which practically every alcoholic has
is that his long period of sobriety and selfdiscipline
had qualified him to drink as other men. Out came his
carpet slippers and a bottle. In two months he was
in a hospital, puzzled and humiliated. He tried to
regulate his drinking for a little while, making several trips
to the hospital meantime. Then, gathering all his
forces, he attempted to stop altogether and found he
could not. Every means of solving his problem which
MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM 33
money could buy was at his disposal. Every attempt
failed. Though a robust man at retirement, he went
to pieces quickly and was dead within four years.
This case contains a powerful lesson. most of us
have believed that if we remained sober for a long
stretch, we could thereafter drink normally. But here
is a man who at fiftyfive years found he was just
where he had left off at thirty. We have seen the truth
demonstrated again and again: "Once an alcoholic, al
ways an alcoholic." Commencing to drink after a
period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as
ever. If we are planning to stop drinking , There must
be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion
that someday we will be immune to alcohol.
Young people may be encouraged by this man's ex
perience to think that they can stop, as he did, on
their own will power. We doubt if many of them can
do it, because none will really want to stop, and hardly
one of them, because of the peculiar mental twist al
ready acquired, will find he can win out. Several of
our crowd, men of thirty or less, had been drinking
only a few years, but they found themselves as help
less as those who had been drinking twenty years.
To be gravely affected, one does not necessarily
have to drink a long time nor take the quantities
some of us have. This is particularly true of women.
Potential female alcoholics often turn into the real
thing and are gone beyond recall in a few years.
Certain drinkers, who would be greatly insulted if
called alcoholics, are astonished at their inability to
stop. We, who are familiar with the symptoms, see
large numbers of potential alcoholics among young
34 ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS
people everywhere. But try and get them to see it! *
As we look back, we feel we had gone on drinking
many years beyond the point where we could quit on
our will power. If anyone questions whether he has
entered this dangerous area, let him try leaving liquor
alone for one year. If he is a real alcoholic and very
far advanced, there is scant chance of success. In the
early days of our drinking we occasionally remained
sober for a year or more, becoming serious drinkers
again later. Though you may be able to stop for a con
siderable period, you may yet be a potential alcoholic.
We think few, to whom this book will appeal, can stay
dry anything like a year. Some will be drunk the day
after making their resolutions; most of them within a
few weeks.
For those who are unable to drink moderately the
question is how to stop altogether. We are assuming,
of course, that the reader desires to stop. Whether
such a person can quit upon a non-spiritual basis de
pends upon the extent to which he has already lost
the power to choose whether he will drink or not.
Many of us felt that we had plenty of character. There
was a tremendous urge to cease forever. Yet we found
it impossible. This is the baffling feature of alcoholism
as we know it is this utter inability to leave it alone,
no matter how great the necessity or the wish.
How then shall we help our readers determine, to
their own satisfaction, whether they are one of us?
The experiment of quitting for a period of time will
be helpful, but we think we can render an even greater
service to alcoholic sufferers and perhaps to the medi
MORE ABOUT ALCOHOLISM 35
cal fraternity. So we shall describe some of the mental
states that precede a relapse into drinking, for ob
viously this is the crux of the problem.
What sort of thinking dominates an alcoholic who
repeats time after time the desperate experiment of
the first drink? Friends who have reasoned with him
after a spree which has brought him to the point of
divorce or bankruptcy are mystified when he walks
directly into a saloon. Why does he? Of what is he
thinking?
Our first example is a friend we shall call Jim. This
man has a charming wife and family. He inherited a
lucrative automobile agency. He had a commendable
World War record. He is a good salesman. Every
body likes him. He is an intelligent man, normal so far
as we can see, except for a nervous disposition. He did
no drinking until he was thirtyfive. In a few years he
became so violent when intoxicated that he had to be
committed. On leaving the asylum he came into con
tact with us.
&n